Saturday, 4 July 2009

Umineko no Naku Koro ni ~1~

OBJECTION!



-Get the fuck out of my screen Ushiromiya Maria



I initially thought Maria as cute in the manga but HECK, SHE IS FUCKING ANNOYING IN THE ANIME.

Umineko no naku koro ni is basically part of the "-no naku koro ni" series. Many fans have debated if both series were related or not. Check YouTube, they argue a lot there.

Either way, this episode...

Episode 1 kicks off with the opening first (dramatic, bea
utiful, touching, haunting melody). On a dark and stormy night, Ushiromiya Kinzou, head of the Ushiromiya family, is told that he only has about three more months to live by his doctor. Opening a window when he's alone, Kinzou calls out loud for Beatrice and asks why is it that she rejects him so much and claims that he will return everything she gave to him now all for the exchange of her smile.

The scene then changes to a bright and sunny day with
Battler (refer above) being an idiot to stand at the helm of the boat's forward pulpit (correct me if I'm wrong). His family and him are on the way to Rokken Island where the entire Ushiromiya family meet on this private land and catch up on each other. On the boat with him are...


  • Uroshimiya George
  • Uroshimiya Maria
  • Ushiromiya Rosa (Maria's mother)
  • Uroshimiya Hideyoshi
  • Uroshimiya Eva
  • Uroshimiya Rudolf
  • Uroshimiya Kyrie
(Names are highlighted according to relations. As for the ones left white, I have no idea.)

The group is greeted by Battler's cousin, Uroshimiya Jessica, and he remarks that they haven't met for 6 years and shamelessly asks to squeeze her "eyes". Naturally he got beaten up. Jessica is accompanied by elderly Kumasawa Chiyo and Gouda Toushirou. Battler flatters her by telling her that she looks younger every year and she replies him with...



Delightfully, he passes the chance. George notes that there are no seagulls around. Hideyoshi seems blur and Jessica suggests that a typhoon would be coming because she heard that it'll start raining by evening. Maria starts pointing to a rock while saying "Not there! Not there!". Jessica notes that the rock formerly had a shrine on it and explains that it's gone now because it got destroyed after being struck by lightning. Battler comments on Maria's good memory. She then goes batshit annoying by saying "Sinister... Sinister" (Seriously, fuck you, Maria.)

Battler explains their purpose of "catching up" but in truth, "the adult's objective is actually something else" as they move from the port to the mansion. Upon reaching, everyone admires the roses in the garden while annoying bitch catches site of a rose which is not well. Battler thinks it's the bug's fault and George agrees. George ties a marker on the rose so that it'll stand out and annoying bitch can take care of it until they go back. Hideyoshi notices Kanon, a servant of the house. Battler introduces himself and Kanon only bows in response. Jessica explains that Kanon is a silent boy and talks only when he needs to. Gouda reprimands Kanon for not giving the guests a warmer welcome and Kanon replies with "We're just... furniture" before moving away

As they enter the mansion, Rudolf asks of Kinzou's (his father) condition. Jessica replies that he's doing fine and no one can even tell he's only got three months left.

It's 12 noon and they're now in a room. A maid (Shannon) informs that their meIals are ready. Jessica invites her in. She asks if Battler still remembers Shannon. He remembers and tells her that she's become a beauty before moving on to the topic of her "eyes". Just as he's about to grope them, Jessica stops him while telling him that he's annoying.

The scene changes to Ushiromiya Krauss calling Kinzou out of his room as everyone has gathered now. Kinzou harshly tells him that he's noisy and calls them fools. Krauss backs off after saying that he's completely hated and tells servant Ronoue Genji that he's going downstairs.

It's 1 o' clock now and Battler, Jessica, George and annoying bitch are led by Shannon to another part of the house to dine. As they walk, Battler feels as though a pair of eyes are watching him. Instinctively he turns only to face a portrait of Beatrice. He asks if the painting was there before. Shannon explains that Kinzou had an artist paint it the April before last. Annoying bitch claims that she knows the person in the portrait to be Beatrice. George backs her by saying "The witch, Beatrice" when Battler appears confused. Jessica continues to explain that Kinzou believes that the witch exists. Battler remains scepticle.

The entire family but Kinzou has gathered to dine now. Battler narrates the story of his grandfather, Kinzou, about his riches.

"Through the late 1800's and the early 1900's, the Ushiromiya family was prosperous and owned several spinning mills. But in the Great Kanto Earthquake of 1923, we lost most of our wealth and family members in an instant. Then our grandfather was given the duty of reviving the Ushiromiya family. Using the family's remaining wealth, his great luck and a lot of unbelievable miracles, he made the Ushiromiya family more prosperous than ever in around 20 years. He's just that amazing!

The adults gather in a room. The camera once again glances at the rose. Rudolf goes straight to the point to discuss father's assets. Hideyoshi notes that Rudolf is a person who usually knows what to do. Rudolf agrees but says that he's made an error while looking at Krauss. Eva comments that he's used a lot of money in order to build a beautiful resort hotel and care for its beautiful garden. Krauss looks provoked but keeps silent. His wife, Ushiromiya Natsuhi speaks up by asking "WEhat exactly are you trying to say?". Rudolf asks when is the hotel going to open and further notes that if this keeps up, Krauss' hands will get "dirty". Eva mocks Krauss more by asking about the money he used on the project. Hideyoshi explains that they've been trying to find out who's giving Krauss an enormous financial support. Rudolf continues saying that they never found any. He comes to the conclusion that Krauss is using their father's private funds for his own business. Eva chips in saying that it isn't diverting but embezzlement and it's a clear crime. Natsuhi, provoked, stands up and accuses Eva of being rude and that her statement was a humiliation to their family heir, Krauss. Eva defends herself by saying that Krauss is betraying their father and thus has no right to call himself the heir. Natsuhi, further angered, orders Eva to get out of the room. Eva calls Natushi a whore and tells her to shut up.

"You're ordering me, the third in the family, to get out? Why do you think that you're not allowed to wear the One-Winged Eagle on your clothes? You're nothing more than a borrowed womb to house the next successor of the Ushiromiya family! Cut your coat according to your cloth!"


Natsuhi get very upset over it. Krauss makes it worse by requesting her to leave the room. Natushi runs out crying. Rudolf watches on with slight amusement. Kyrie pretends that nothing has happened and continues drinking her tea as Rosa watches on. Natsuhi goes to a dark corner of the house to cry and is spotted by Sawakuma Chiyo who symphatizes with her.

Meanwhile, the "kids" are checking out the poem next to Beatrice's portrait. He thinks it's a strange passage. Jessica explains that it's an epitaph Kinzou requested someone to write. Annoying bitch claims to know what it is and that it's the place the hidden gold is. Jessica thinks its outrageous to have ten tonnes of gold. Battler proceeds to narrate the legend of the Ushiromiya's family gold.

How did our grandfather get his funds in the first place? There's a strange story behind it. After we asked him, our gradfather answered:


One day, I met Beatrice, the Golden Witch. We made a contract.In exchange for my soul, she would give me wealth and fame. Then I received ten tonnes of gold from the witch.
And that's the explanation.


Battler, too, finds it outrageous. George does the maths


If you estimate one kilogram to be two million yen, it all adds up to twenty billion yen!

Battler finds it pretty unrealistic. He does not believe in witches. Annoying bitch insists that Beatrice exists
(Fucking Uuu! Uuu! -ing ninth grader) . Jessica tells Battler not to trample on the dreams of little children. Battler apologizes and says Beatrice exists just to appease annoying bitch. He continues saying that their grandmother said that Beatrice is living in the forest right now. However, annoying bitch doubts it but Battler wins her over by apologizing for argueing with her. Jessica then decides to have a picnic on the beach with cookies. Battler is the last to leave as he continues staring at the portrait and sneers at the legend. The scene then has a glass surface break at the position Battler was at. Two o' clock.

By a quarter past two, the meeting is still on among the adults.The siblings have decided on conditions for Krauss to take over the heir.

Condition One [Rudolf]
"First, you must admit to finding Father's hidden gold."
Condition Two [Eva]
"Allow each sibling to have a portion of the gold, and give it to us."
Condition Three [Hideyoshi]
"The family heir receives 50% of the gold. The remaining will be split among the siblings. Of course, that includes you."
Condition Four [Rudolf]
"The distribution of the gold will take place at the time of Father's death. However, 10% must be paid to each of us now as a deposit. The rest must be paid before March of next year."

Hideyoshi asks how does Krauss feel about the conditions. Krauss appears to have a trick up his sleeve though...

To Hideyoshi
"I heard some shady people bought a huge share of your company's stock, am I right?"
To Rudolf
"I heard you were sentenced to pay a few million dollars of settlement by the American court. But that's not a lot of money, right?"
To Rosa
"You shouldn't be too soft-hearted... You may just be the co-signer, but you can't be so relaxed."

Amongst all of them, Rosa has the biggest reaction. She yells in retaliation "That has nothing to do with this!". Hideyoshi was shocked and Rudolf shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Krauss pretends to sympathize with them in mockery and proceeds to tell that he has no money with him currently. He mentioned that like all of them wished, it'll be good if one could find Kinzou's hidden gold. He suggests solving Beatrice's epitaph and laughs
(Rot in hell).

On the beach, Jessica notes that annoying bitch is serious about the entire witch-thing for she recorded the entire epitaph. Battler comments that the middle of the epitaph gets pretty ugly.
"By the eigth twilight, 13 people will have become living sacrifices. On the ninth twilight, the witch shall be revived and no one will survive. On the tenth twilight, you should arrive at the golden land"
Annoying bitch makes her "Uuu!" sound again as Battler and Jessica mock the epitaph.
(I AM NOT GOING TO QUOTE WHAT SHE SAID. Uuu Uuu BITCH) . Annoying bitch believes that Jessica and Battle will enrage Beatrice so she hands them scorpian bracelets as a protection against Beatrice. She believes scorpians can block magic and bad luck. Battler and Jessica thanks annoying bitch. Dark clouds begin to cover the sky.

Though the winds are blowing strongly, annoying bitch wants to take a look at her rose. Annoying bitch catches sight of her mum, Rosa and calls for her to help search for the rose. Annoying bitch keeps going Uuu Uuu Uuu Uuu Uuu Uuu. Rosa tells her to stop but annoying bitch doesn't. Feeling annoyed and pissed, Rosa slaps annoying bitch (STRIKE!). Annoying bitch screams about her rose again and again before recceiving another slap (NICE ONE!)
I hope you die soon so I won't have to put up with your Uuu- Uuu's any longer, bitch. YOU'RE NINE FOR GOD'S SAKE!) Battler tries to advise Rosa but she argues saying annoying bitch is a fourth grader and is nine years old. The winds grow stronger. George pulls Battler away, telling him it's a family problem. They enter the mansion first. Rosa tries to drag annoying bitch in but she INSISTS on looking for her rose. Pissed, Rosa leaves her alone. She feels hurt but hardens her heart to go on.

The storm finally begins. Kinzou is at his window laughing like a maniac. He says that Beatrice is late and their miraculous banquet shall begin now. He begins by throwing the token of the head of Ushiroyama family into the air. Lightning strikes.

It is 6 o' clock in the evening now. Annoying bitch is still out there searching for her rose. A figure approaches her...

Kanon calls the "children" for dinner. He notices that annoying bitch is not with them and asks for her. Battler, George and Jessica appear confused for they had assumed bitch was with her mum. Kanon replies that he thought she was with them. The trio go into "shock mode".

Rosa is outside searching her her bitch child out in the rain. She regrets her actions. The trio meet up with Rosa and they all begin a search for bitch child.

Battler spots bitch at the same spot she was at earlier. She's holding an umbrella. And she claims that Beatrice gave it to her .... . .





OH GO TO HELL PLEASE USHIROMIYA MARIA



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